In general, getting rejected hardly ever feels good. This factsheet is to share some tools and strategies to assist you to prepare for, cope with, and recuperate from rejection. This is meant for all scenarios in life in general and will teach you how to handle rejection like a pro.
Why does rejection hurt sometimes?
Rejection hurts. It typically feels personal, like we weren’t sufficient for someone or something, which can lead us to great deals of other negative thoughts or feelings about ourselves. And in some cases that psychological discomfort can feel comparable in our bodies to physical pain (e.g., feeling your heart drop, getting a headache or feeling woozy, discovering a rising “battle or flight” sensation, and so on).
“Rejection – and the fear of rejection – is the biggest impediment we can to choosing ourselves”.
James Altucher
Before Dealing With Rejection
One method to take the sting out of dealing with rejection is preparing for it. Rather, it means thinking about why you desire things and experiences, what it means when you can’t have them and acknowledging where you might need assistance to assist you to feel less alone if and when rejection happens.
- Acknowledging rejection in your life. Maybe your friends do not like the film you want to see, or perhaps your neighbor’s canine escapes when you wish to pet it — we face rejection all the time. Recognizing and accepting the little manner ins which you may experience rejection can assist make it much easier when you get turned down for larger things (like relationships, or tasks, or school).
- Learning to take risks Rejection can occur when we take dangers and ask for what we want, so putting yourself out there in low-stakes methods can help you find out how rejection feels, and how to manage it. If you get turned down, reflect on the experience.
- Prevent putting all your eggs in one basket. Rejection can hurt since we put a great deal of energy into believing that things are expected to go a particular method, or that a person thing we desire is necessary to make us delighted. However, doing that can cut us off from other unforeseen or amazing possibilities. While it’s good to put energy into a relationship, it’s also good to put energy into relationships or hobbies so that you do not put excessive pressure on a single person for your joy.
- Speak with other individuals about getting turned down. Knowing that other people have actually gone through the same thing, which there are individuals in your life who will support you, can make the concern of rejection appear like less of a disastrous event.
During Rejection
Rejection can happen in great deals of methods: personally, online, by phone/text, etc. Sometimes it’s a surprise, and often you know it’s coming. It can be difficult to know exactly how you’ll respond. However, here are some things to think about on how to deal with being turned down:
- Require time to cool off. It can be a great idea to take a while away from someone who has actually rejected you. If it injures or if you feel upset, this can be especially essential so that you don’t say or do something that you’ll regret. Harming them back might feel satisfying in the minute, however, it won’t assist in the long run.
- Immerse yourself in the emotion you are feeling. There is no best method to feel when someone turns you down. It’s all right to need support, however, consider other individuals you can go to rather than making the person(s) who rejected you to deal with your sensations.
- Surround yourself with supportive individuals. Being around individuals who make you feel good and appreciate you can be extremely practical. Even if somebody has actually rejected you doesn’t imply that there aren’t great deals of people who do accept you.
- Or require time to be alone. As fantastic as family and pals can be, it is better to be on your own for a little while. It’s okay to lean on other individuals, however, it’s likewise fine to take a break from individuals. Enjoy your own business for a while.
- Seek Professional Help. In some cases, friends and households don’t have the right words or suggestions to help you through the more difficult parts of rejection. Counselors, therapists, and other assistance services are offered for short- or long-lasting help to assist individuals to recover.
After Rejection
Accepting rejection can be tough, even after the preliminary hurt has actually passed. Here are some things to believe about when dealing with accepting rejection:
Healing takes some time. As much of a cliché as it is, time does help. Recovery can’t be rushed or forecasted. If you wind up feeling much better for a bit and then worse again later, it’s fine. Healing can look like a curved road with ups and downs. Your experience will be unique to you, influenced by your scenario and/or the nature of the rejection.
Taking it personally If it feels like somebody’s rejection of you was personal, maybe it was. Just because one person does not value or like something about you doesn’t suggest that other individuals won’t.
Reflection. Every experience can teach us something, even getting rejection. Reflecting on the experience can help you grow and prepare for the next time you are declined.
Don’t stop taking risks. The hurt or experience of dealing with rejection can sit with you for a while, and that’s okay. However, it’s essential to discover methods to work with that feeling, not to restrict yourself y it Rejection may be a part of your life experience, but it doesn’t define you as an individual. You have lots to provide!